Maps, DNA and spam

This is a really cool website with lots of interesting maps.

Strange Maps

Make sure you've got some extra time on your hands, this website will suck you in!

Lion in oil

Fire Millen.

Bush's image, peg Amish sub

OK - if you voted for Bush, in '00 or in '04, don't you feel a little bit, well, I don't know...

screwed?

This guy does.

Here's a new term for the 'borrow and spend' Republicans: obsessive spending

Satire veritas

So I'm bringing back the blog!

The reason I was gone for so long: I moved and got a new internet service, a free one associated w/ my apartment complex, but it had a filter on it blocking blogspot! How lame is that. I spent two months without youtube, too.

Anyways, I'm back. I got a recent traffic bump by making some satirical posts on Ms. Debbie Schlussel's website, which apparently people appreciated (see the comments to my previous posting, "To Illegal Flag, Elliot") I'm glad people out there still appreciate good satire.

Anyways, not much else to report for the time being, but I'm open to suggestions as far as subject matter, or even just post title ideas - I'm honestly starting to run out. I'll try to have a real post up soon.

Cheers 'til then!

Shap

To illegal flag, Elliot

Conservative hate group "Stop The ACLU" (they hate freedom) has certainly got their panties in a bunch over some pretty profound, though potentially offensive art.

It's a display of the Confederate flag, hung from the gallows.

I think it's fantastic art. Some Southerners are quite offended. Freedom of expression includes your freedom to be offended.

Anyone who believes that the Civil War had nothing to do with slavery needs to go back and take a high school history course. Ahh... remember when Republicans were the good guys?

Sex at noon, taxes

OK - pretty much two separate posts today, but they can both fit under the same header. Here goes:

1. Newt Gingrich is a hypocrite. He didn't do anything illegal, he's just a lying, cheating, hypocrite. He hounded Clinton for doing the same thing that he was doing, at exactly the same time.

I know Clinton lied under oath to a Federal Judge, but the question he was answering was a personal one, and should never have been asked. He couldn't take the Fifth, because he hadn't committed a crime, he was just trying to protect his family and their reputation. Scooter Libby, on the other hand, lied about a matter of national security, and the right wing nutcases are making him out to be some kind of scapegoat or pariah.

So much for "protecting the family". Giuliani and McCain have had much publicized extra-marital affairs, too. Mitt Romney belongs to a religion that supports polygamy. If you're a Bible-belt Republican, for whom do you cast your vote?

2. "If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet" - George Harrison

An 80-year-old couple in rural Illinois is being intimidated with felony charges by the Illinois Department of Revenue. Their crime? Modifying their car to run on vegetable oil (they get 46mpg) and then not paying $2,500 to register as a "special fuel supplier", when in fact they were using recycled grease from restaurant fryers. They are estimated to owe a lofty $4.07 per month in back-taxes. Shameful.

Tune nut

Do you love classic rock? I know I do.

If you answered "yes" - I give you Wolfgang's Vault. The classics, live, streaming, and free.

Norma is as selfless as I am, Ron

Ronnie, I love ya to death.

This post is dedicated to Mahoney, one of my two readers (the other being my parents)

Now no lure, Rulon won

I think that we need to change the list of Chuck Norris Facts, to the list of Rulon Gardner Facts. Especially now that we know Chuck is a bible-thumping pussy.

Seriously, Rulon Gardner is indestructible. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Rulon Gardner allows to live. Rulon Gardner doesn't use after shave, he uses liquid hot magma. Rulon Gardner doesn't get frostbite, he bites frost.

Doesn't it work so much better?

Name no one man

I wonder if this pastor from Oklahoma City knows our good friend Ted Haggard?

Draw a level award.

Shaquille O'Neal called the last two MVP awards given by the NBA 'tainted'. Those awards were won by wily Canadian Steve Nash, who definitely earned them, though an argument could be made for Kobe Bryant last season.

Here's some advice for you, Shaq. Why don't you shut the hell up, and stick to doing what you do best, which is resting your aching body until the playoffs. What's that? Oh, you might not even make the playoffs? Maybe it's time to start thinking about retirement. I used to enjoy your antics, but you may have overstayed your welcome...

Love,
Shap

Guns to Obama: boot snug?

I'm really starting to like this guy.

Yell avoid art radio valley

By now you've probably heard that the two major satellite radio providers XM and Sirius are planning to merge. I predicted this a couple of years ago, but I'm not here toot my own horn. I want to show why the merger doesn't violate any anti-trust regulations, and should be allowed to proceed.

USA Today had conflicting editorials regarding the merger, including this scathing attack by private media consultant Jimmy Schaeffler: Reject their request

It seems like Schaeffler's only legitimate gripe is that neither XM nor Sirius has demonstrated profitability, possibly due to poor business planning. He takes the attack too far however:

Moreover, it is disingenuous, if not ludicrous, to suggest that XM and Sirius face financial woes because of threats from Internet radio, iPods or alternative music platforms.

Well, I don't think anybody is arguing that the companies' financial woes stem entirely from competition from Internet radio and iPods, so your disingenuous straw man is easily squashed. However, I think the argument in itself is disingenuous, because he is making the case that satellite radio is a market unto itself, and faces no competition from outside sources. This is clearly false.

I got Sirius with my new Jeep last year, including a 1-year trial subscription. I won't be renewing when the trial period ends, mainly due to the fact I can bring my iPod in the car with me and listen to whatever I want. Other reasons include workable free radio options in the Denver area, and cheap factory dashboard displays on all Chrysler cars.

XM and Sirius may have been built upon poor business models, but that's not the only reason for their lack of success thus far. The main obstacles to their profitability have been competition between the companies, as well as from iPods, terrestrial and HD radio, the internet and wi-fi, and even digital cable. They also have to pay the government for use of their airwaves, about $90 million each, a fee not levied upon terrestrial radio broadcasters.

The bottom line is, this merger can only benefit both companies and their subscribers. The competition between XM and Sirius wasn't helping anyone, so why not give them a chance to provide comprehensive radio coverage, in order to compete fairly in their own market. If they can't do a good job as a provider, then we as consumers don't have to buy their product because we have plenty of other options. It's really that simple.

No, I tax every pyre vexation

Great article by Rolling Stone writer Matt Taibbi: Maybe We Deserve to be Ripped Off by Bush's Billionaires (warning: liberal media bias)

We can't afford to repeal the estate tax at this point. I definitely agree with Obama's view on this issue.

Dogma: I am God

Repenting made easy: iGod

Just don't ask him anything about robots.

Mother at song no star, eh Tom?

I decided that I'm going to start a Tom Petty cover band. I am dead serious about this. I will go it alone, if I have to, but I just don't see how this wouldn't work. These are the songs I already know:

Free Fallin'
Won't Back Down
Last Dance w/ Mary Jane
Learning to Fly
Refugee
You Wreck Me
American Girl
The Waiting
Into the Great Wide Open

Not a bad start, right? I need to rehearse for a bit, but I think I could nail all those songs. If I add a few more, that should be about an hour's worth of entertainment. I'll probably have to start at open mics and coffee shops, but I think this could be a lucrative opportunity on the bar scene, down the road.

Drab as a fool, aloof as a bard.

Quote from Dubya's press release yesterday, Feb. 14th:

One of the problems -- not specifically on this issue, just in general -- let's put it this way, money trumps peace, sometimes. In other words, commercial interests are very powerful interests throughout the world.

Good explanation, George. First-draft has some more analysis of the press conference: Your President Speaks!

Mirth, sir, a gay asset? No, don't essay a garish trim.

You gotta admit, Tim Hardaway has got some balls. The guy knows how he feels, and is not afraid to let it be known. Most of us may not agree with him, but you gotta respect the guy's right to speak his mind.

Come on, it's not like he's running for president.

A slut was I ere I saw Tulsa

OK, I have an announcement to make. It is entirely possible, that I, Shap, am the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby. I mean, I do get pretty drunk sometimes, and I don't always remember what I was doing. I'll bet my chances are better than getting struck by lightning...

(Obviously this is a joke, but maybe it will get me some traffic!)

Joking aside, wouldn't you rather have a dose of reality?

UPDATE: No visitors today, as of 3:30PM Wednesday. Apparently my little ruse didn't work so well.

Name, career: free race, man.

Vincent Carroll of the Rocky Mountain News exposes some extremely shallow racism in the Cherry Creek School District. I'm pretty much dumbfounded.

Luckily, conservative blogger La Shawn Barber has some insight.

I'm not sure what to think of this, it almost seems too ridiculous to be true.